The Lives Of Others

I’ve had a bit of a down week, as you will be able to see. A few stressful life events have meant I got anxious about uni. Which in turn made me question if I really should be doing what I am. But it wasn’t all doom and gloom. I’ve been joining a few design-related groups and getting inducted into various workshops and I found out I might be going to Amsterdam.

The first project at university was all about creating a film poster. Now, this is something I’ve done a number of times before. But I don’t get to choose the film this time. Which has resulted in me designing a poster for a film called The Lives Of Others. This is not the sort of thing I would normally watch. It’s a cold war film about a Stasi agent doing surveillance on a writer trying to publish an article in the West.

It’s surprising how difficult the project is considering I’ve done it before. The course places a lot more emphasis on small details. Something you never really had to bother with at college. I’m not just making a film poster. I’m creating something which shows the emotion of the film. And more importantly, something which a person would be able to understand when they look at it.

When I was at college one thing everyone talked about was how you would have an advantage going into second year. Having already done graphic design for two years and knowing how to use the software. What I’m finding is that isn’t quite true.

IMPOSTER SYNDROME AT UNIVERSITY

There is one slight problem with this project. I worry I won’t create something good enough. This is mad of course. But I still have that little voice in my brain going you’re not good enough for this. In fact, I’ve gone as far as to worry they’ve made a mistake with giving me a place. I know it’s just my brain telling me that with no proof to go on. But looking at the other students and their work, it makes me wonder if I’m good enough to be here.

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It’s frustrating because I used to have these thoughts while at college. But by the end of those three years, I was pretty confident. In fact becoming more confident with my work was the most important thing I learned there. But it seems something about moving to university has caused me to lose all that confidence. Even knowing certain things my lecturers have told me about my work hasn’t helped. I can only hope this is something which will get better with time.

THAT’S ALL FOLKS

This is all a little heavy. Things probably aren’t as bad as I’m making them out to be. I’ve just had a bit of a crap week and getting used to all these new things isn’t helping. On a lighter note, I became part of the design team for the student-run magazine at my university.

This is something I’m really excited about. I loved the editorial projects at college and I get to continue that at uni. It also means I will be able to have my work published in a proper magazine.

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